


The Infant Menace

by Joythea



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Baby food hell, Comedy, Funny, Gen, Nana being a Nice Mom, Quatro Tsuna trolling Reborn, Reborn dealing with baby food, Shamal as Reborn's babysitter, Shamal cooking baby food, Shamal feeding Reborn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-22
Updated: 2016-10-22
Packaged: 2018-08-23 22:44:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8345662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Joythea/pseuds/Joythea
Summary: Have you ever wondered how Reborn really dealt with transitioning to a baby?One-shot, companion piece to The Five Star Chef Decimo.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This was a idea spurred by the Five Star Chef Decimo. Thus it might spoil a bit of what's to come for the story when Reborn arrives. Just a rather lame humourous take on how Reborn handled becoming an Arcobaleno.

It was infuriating. Not only did he trick them to be shrunk, he made them go through the first stage of life all over again. With the mind of an adult trapped in the body of an infant, hell naturally broke loose.

“What the hell happened to you?” Those were the first words out of Shamal’s mouth, and Reborn began to regret his decision.

“Became an Arcobaleno.” He said curtly.

“Yes, I can see that,” Shamal said in an irritated tone. “but why are you a _baby_? Last time I saw you I swore you were an adult. What did the Arcobaleno do to you to become like this?” He demanded.

“Confidential.” No matter what happened, he couldn’t outright tell him.

Besides, even if he told him, Reborn was sure the doctor would offer him a ride to a mental institute.

“So you need my help for…?” The man asked, curious.

At that moment, a stink lingered in the air. Shamal refused to say a word, because if he did, he would be shot.

* * *

 “You have really reverted back into a child. I think this should be temporary.” The doctor said after doing the checkup.

“How so?”

“Well, you can speak very well unlike most babies, and you can walk. Yet your other functions have reverted, such as…” Shamal did not continue, the meaning very clear. “Well, I doubt you have to live as a baby forever. How would the Arcobaleno uphold their reputation if they can’t do the basic things?”

“True.” Then, their stomachs grumbled.

“So what do you want?” Shamal asked after they finally calmed down from the raging storm previously.

“Some pasta would do.” Reborn said.

“Let me warn firsthand I am not the best cook out there, so don’t expect five star restaurant quality.” The doctor pointed, and then disappeared into the kitchen.

“Just hurry up.”

* * *

 He could smell the pasta a long time away, and then began eating. Then he choked, throwing up what he had eaten.

“Whoops, I totally forgot. You need to eat baby food.” The doctor concluded.

“Shamal, you have got to be joking. I can talk but I can’t eat solid food?”

“I am not. You can’t eat solids the way you are now. I suppose you have to deal with it for now. I think whatever turned you into this kind of screwed you over. Anyway, baby food is kind of easy to make so hold on a minute.” The man took the plate and poured its contents into a mixer.

* * *

 “Look, I really don’t want to do this but can you please eat it?” Shamal said in an exasperated tone, trying to feed the infant. “I spent a lot of time trying to make it you know.”

“I can eat by myself.” Reborn stubbornly said, refusing to budge.

“Oh really, look at the mess you made when I left you alone with it. I know this is hurting your pride, but please eat. I don’t want to end up with a dead baby and get arrested by Child Services or sued for child neglect." The man insisted in a tired tone. "Now, aah.“ The hitman reluctantly gave in, allowing himself to be pampered by the doctor.

The disgusting baby food left a bitter taste in Reborn’s mouth. Inwardly, he cursed Checkerface and swore when the day comes, he was going to shove baby food down his throat.

* * *

After days of thrashing around and the house in disarray from all the fighting and arguing, everything came to a halt.

“I can finally eat solids. Finally. The baby food days are no more.” Reborn heaved a sigh of relief.

“You’re not the only one. Hallejuah.” Shamal said, before collapsing onto the floor.

Little did he know, pretending to be a baby came back to bite him in the ass afterwards when he decided to home tutor a certain brunet to be Vongola Decimo.

“Mom! Reborn’s hungry! He can’t teach me on an empty stomach you know! After all, he is a _growing_ baby.” Tsuna emphasized on the word, leading to a kick to the stomach.

“Oh dear, you’re right! I need to make baby food. Reborn, what kind of baby food would you like?” Nana walked over, concerned.

“Maman, I would prefer solid food-” He got cut off.

“Oh no no no! You're just a baby! Tsuna is right that you are growing. I need to make sure you don't choke and get nutrients you dearly need! So what kind of baby food would you like?” She asked with a smile on her face.

He cursed in his mind, mentally noting that he would punish his student to hell later.

**Author's Note:**

> This was one of my shortest and least detailed works I have ever written. Any more and it would get bloated out with more details. I hope you had a slight laugh at this. I know that baby food is not entirely awful, but this is played up for laughs. No baby food or babies have been harmed in the making of this fanfic.


End file.
